I am carrying a burden. I’ve been doing it for years. It seems that every year, it gets a bit heavier. Today, I asked myself how long I intend to drag this thing around, this bag of bricks. Maybe it’s time to lay it down.
Anyone who knows me well, knows that I am a Class A Worrier, a summa cum laude graduate of The Institute for Gigantic Horrified Thinking (T.I.G.H.T.). My husband’s response to this over the years has been to act as my foil and to not worry about anything. This only serves to invoke my hyper-responsibility. After all, if I don’t worry, who else will?
The more I worry, fret, and stew, the heavier my bag of bricks becomes. Worse, my incessant worrying has become a habit, which, in turn, has almost become a way of life.
I said “almost.”
Fortunately, I’m not totally over the edge. I do have the ability to get a grip once in a while, and I’m learning that it is not my responsibility to handle everything for everyone, or to protect all people from every threat, real or imagined. It is not my job. It is God’s.
Let’s say my child came to me and said, “Mom, I’m worried that we’re not getting a good enough interest rate on our mortgage,” or something similar. That would be ridiculous. She knows her parents take care of things like that. If she did spend all her time fretting, I would feel badly for her. I would want her to enjoy being a kid, and let us worry about grown-up things. I would want her to be carefree and joyful.
God wants me to live without worry, too, and somewhere in my heart of hearts, I believe that He will always take care of me. I believe it for you, so I should believe it for me.
I don’t know exactly how many times Jesus said, “Do not worry,” but I know He said it a lot. (Makes me think maybe He meant it…) Perhaps it is time for me to lay down this bag of bricks, and give it to Him to carry. He promised He would.
We’re all lugging around a bag of bricks of some sort. What kind of bricks are yours?
Are you ready to lay them down?
I pray we can both do that.
Today.
“Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens.” (Psalm 68:19, NIV)
This, as always, was right on time. I ask God to take my brick and then I selfishly cling to it. I wish he would pop my hand!
Love you,
Jo
You keep writing about my life. lol I’ve had a wheelbarrow full of bricks for several months and just unloaded a bunch when He gave me an answer that unburdened my soul. I had forgotten to pray specifically, and when I did, the wheelbarrow dumped. God will take care of mom. I can’t be there every second to ease her pain, but God will. Bless you for your insight, Wendi.